So last Sunday a dude broke the world record for running a half marathon while dribbling two basketballs for the entire 13.1 miles. I’m not going to go into why there is even a world record for this. The important thing to know is that he ran a 1:32. A 1:32!!! That’s a 7 minute mile pace for an hour and a half of basketball wrangling (while dodging other runners). Needless to say I was impressed. It got me wondering about other ridiculous yet notable activities people engage in while running marathons.

And then I realized I’m totally guilty of the least impressive race activity. Facebooking. Of course, it doesn’t require even a tenth of the coordination of basketball dude, but it can be just as dangerous. If running a big city marathon is the equivalent of driving on a crowded LA freeway, then attempting to post on Facebook while careening down a hill with 20,000 runners behind you IS just as dangerous. But unlike texting while driving, it’s not exactly illegal.

The appeal is understandable. If you saw half the crazy looking people, signs, and costumes while walking around town, I guarantee you’d be filling your instagram page in a matter of seconds. How is it that running a marathon makes it any less Facebook worthy? It doesn’t!! It’s not a picture of your $50 dinner, your dessert, your coffee, or your dog sleeping. You’re running a freaking marathon! You don’t do this every day! But… if you’re going to post while running, remember that it does require a certain amount of skill. You might want to even practice beforehand, so you don’t wind up in the hospital.

Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

Pre-race: if using an iPhone, turn the passcode off and set the autolock on your screen for 5 minutes. This is step #1. Skipping this step will make it unlikely you’ll progress past step #1. I learned this the hard way, and had to deal with a phone which autolocked every minute in between attempts, which cost me dearly. And leads to my next point.

You will slow down. You should slow down. You need to be ok with this. Was this meant to be a PR race? Then don’t Facebook and curse yourself later. Considering you will probably slow your pace at least 30 seconds per mile, you’ll lose more than a few minutes. And you don’t want “if only I hadn’t been posting to Facebook” to be your excuse for not getting a PR. It’s as lame as it sounds.

Snap pics for a few minutes, choose one, and post. Don’t bother with a caption, everyone already knows you are running a marathon due to the steady and annoying barrage from your Facebook page over the last few days/weeks/months. If you MUST write a caption, try to keep it limited to one word. This is for your own safety, and the safety of others.

Balance is key. You may find yourself unconsciously balancing with your free arm in between typing spurts, extending it out like the wing of an airplane. This is normal. Go with it. The flailing also serves as a warning to others that you are unstable and should be carefully avoided (like a car swerving on the highway).

Wait till after a fluid station to attempt a post. Accidents happen around fluid stations. Dehydrated runners see water stations, and suddenly it’s chaos, a frenzied dash from a highway with no designated off-ramps. I’ve been tripped around these stations. It’s dangerous enough without being distracted. So try to wait for a long straitaway, then veer off to the side to do your business at a slower pace.

In the event that you drop your phone, do not attempt to go after it. Unless it has flown off to the side of the course, it is a suicide mission. It is gone. Let it go. You have failed and will probably never attempt this again. So let’s not think about that.

Instead, let’s assume triumph. Yay! You’ve successfully posted on Facebook during a marathon! There’s solid proof you were there, and it was posted in the moment! Now put the phone away. Immediately. Get back in the actual moment, you didn’t train for 4 months to spend it on your cellphone.

This post was written by ANTI-Lisa, and originally appeared on her blog. ANTI-Lisa has also recently undertaken running the Chicago Marathon for Direct Relief International – learn more about her story as well as how to help here.